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Nov
18

Happy 1st Day Of Therapy To Me!!!

Happy 1st Day Of Therapy To Me

You might remember this post I wrote over the summer in which I decided to put on my big girl panties and seek therapy with the hopes of being less anxious and cray cray in romantic relationships, especially the one I was in at the time with Ben.

When I went in search of a therapist that my insurance would cover there were only two options in my immediate area. One was a dude and I really didn’t want to talk to a dude about my dude issues so I chose my second option – only I wasn’t able to get an appointment for almost three freaking months with her.

Waiting three months for a therapy appointment seemed absolutely insane at the time. Even Ben instructed me to, “(For the love of God)FIND ANOTHER THERAPIST!!” OK he didn’t say the God part, but I imagine it was exactly what was running through his mind.

I don’t blame him. If I had been dating me at the time I would’ve dreaded being in a relationship with neurotic me for three more months too.

It seems that three month waiting period was all part of the Universe’s grand plan to reserve therapy for a time when I would use it solely for me instead of in an effort to save a dying relationship.

My first appointment also came when I needed it most as I face an epic battle in Court in just two days – an EXTREMELY emotional thing for me.

As I sat in the waiting room this morning I worried I might not like my therapist, but it almost feels like she was made for me.

I mean she ensured me that I was only slightly neurotic, so she was A-OKAY in my book.

She was also impressed with how many issues I’ve already worked through on my own since becoming a single mom over four years ago. I guess most people start therapy with a whole pile of issues to work through, but I really only have one last hurdle to jump – albeit a large one.

Somewhere in my life something made me decide I was not worthy of a healthy relationship and that I don’t deserve unconditional romantic love, and so time and time again I enter into partnerships that are doomed to fail.

I don’t want to be stuck in this vicious cycle any longer. I don’t want ANYONE to be stuck in this type of cycle.

We all deserve better than that.

I may be starting therapy and doing all of this current work on me for me, but I’m also kind of doing it for you.

I want to come out of this a healthier woman, with insights I can share to help those of you that are currently stuck in the same vicious dead-end relationship cycle as me.

Happy 1st Day Of Therapy To Us!!!

 

 

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Related posts:

  1. This Is Why I’m Putting On My Big Girl Pants And Finally Going To Therapy
  2. Just Say No To Casual Sex And Friends With Benefits, If You’re Like Me
  3. Letting Him Go

1 comment

  1. Nicole says:

    Love it! Thanks! Good luck in court. You rock as a mom and a woman.

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